"Wait, when's my birthday?!?"

Monday, March 21, 2011

No, nobody missed my birthday.
And no, it's not QUITE time for my birthday either.
In fact, this post isn't even really about my actual birthday.
But instead, I wanted to share a little something I've been learning about my husband.
And a little story that I find quite amusing.

I mentioned this a few weeks ago:
Max and I had never actually lived together until he returned home from deployment, in February.
To say the least, it's been quite the interesting adventure!

I have been learning a lot about my husband.  
But my favorite lesson so far, 
probably because the stories that result are too good to be true,
is that Max has multiple layers.
Let me explain.
You see, there is the Max that is awake and really truly is awake.
Then there is the Max that is asleep and is really truly asleep.
But then, there is also the Max that appears to be awake, but is actually sleeping.

It's taken me a few weeks to really get this.
I have been tricked more than once.
I'll be laying in bed or wake up and THINK that I am talking to my husband.
But once the morning comes and I mention our conversation, he has NO idea what I am talking about.
This is because, he is really only appearing to be awake, but is actually sleeping.
He's good at this too - eyes open, talking in sentences, answering questions.
So I don't always now how to decipher the awake Max from the "fake"-awake Max.

After discussing this with him, we decided we needed some code.
When in doubt, I am to ask him when my birthday is (it's in April, for the record).
And if still in doubt, I am to question him on our children's birthdays.
If he could get all of them right, he could be deemed awake.
If not, then I could be sure he was sleeping, and only pretending to be awake.

Background complete, I can move onto my story:

Two nights ago,  I am nice and asleep.
I mean, I am dead-to-the-world asleep, conked out, it's like 0300 in the morning.
I am doing my own thing (you know, SLEEPING!) and wake up to yelling from Max.
He must have been pretty loud for me to wake up - in fact, I think I woke up because I thought about how I didn't want him to wake the kids up.
So I wake up to him yelling something, and roll over to go back to sleep (I was SO tired!).
When all of a sudden, whatever he had yelled began to register in my brain.


What?!  What did he just yell?  No way!
And I started to giggle before turning BACK over to question him.

I ask him if he's awake.  
And he tells me that he is (I am quite skeptical at this point, ha ha!)

So I ask him about bunny foo-foo.
And he tells me that little bunny foo-foo needs to be saved.
Um, ok, next question.
I ask him when my birthday is.
His answer? 
"Uh...in the winter!"

So, I ask him if he's awake.
He assures me that he is and asks me about saving bunny foo-foo.
I ask him when my birthday is. Again.
His answer this time?
"In December. No. In March. YEAH! In the spring!"

Wrong. Again.
This man is clearly faking me out here.
His eyes are open, he's talking to me, looking at me, etc.
And he asks me about bunny foo-foo.  For like the fourth time.

At this point, I am giggling so hard I can barely get any words out.
But I somehow manage to ask about bunny foo-foo.
He is starting to get frustrated and tells me bunny foo-foo needs to be saved.
I am laughing harder and harder at the hilarity of this.
And manage to ask yet again about bunny foo-foo and what happened to him.
Max finally replies, in much exasperation:
" I don't KNOW!  I'm tired. Can we play this game in the morning?"

I try to contain my laughter long enough to tell him to go back to sleep.
I turn over and close my eyes, grinning.

I mean, really?!!
Did that seriously happen?!  
Yep, sure did!  
My husband felt that little bunny foo-foo needed to be saved, apparently.
Best part?!
He didn't remember ANYthing about it!
He STILL thinks I am making this all up!

But I am not.
I have just learned my lesson:
my husband has multiple layers.

"Max, when's my birthday?"

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  1. Hahahaha!!! That is freakin' hilarious!!! My husband does the same thing! He'll wake me up talking and then will have no idea the next morning. In fact, one time he actually WAS awake (though I have no idea now what he said) and I told him to go back to sleep. Haha! The first time it happened, we'd been married for maybe 2 months. We'd been watching a lot of Smallville, which I think is what he was dreaming about. All I remember is him propped up on his forearm, holding my hand and saying, "It's ok. I've seen a lot of weird things - I'm from Smallville." LOL!!!!!

    Gotta love him. =)



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