Attitude Check.Tuesday, February 11, 2014
The last few days have been hard for me. I have been impatient, rude, harsh towards the kids and Max. I have overreacted, yelled, "blown my top" if you will, more than I want to admit.
I want to blame it on the weather - the gray days and rain that's kept us inside the house, as opposed to playing out in the fresh air. I want to blame it on the lack of a car - since Max usually takes it to work, which means we are "stuck" at home. I want to blame it on my hormones or my emotions or my lack of sleep.
But that's not fair or right. It's me. The only person responsible and held accountable to how I've been acting and treating my family is myself. It doesn't matter the weather or the circumstances or my feelings - I can still control my attitude, set my tone, choose my words and reactions. I can still choose joy and patience and kindness.
What an attitude check!
I have been thinking a lot about how as a mama, I have great influence over the "tone" of our home. How my attitude affects the attitudes of those around me, and therefore, affects the attitude of our home. I have the ability, the privilege, of "setting the tone". And what have I been doing the last few days? Setting a negative, harsh tone, instead of creating the safe, comforting, loving space that I desire to have.
I know I'll have hard days - that's inevitable - but it's my choice as to how I will deal with them, and how I will deal with my responses to the people around me on the hard days and the easy days.
I want my kids and husband to know I am for them, that I love them, that they are my people. And in order to do that, I need to learn to seek and choose joy, to find my strength in Jesus, to lean on His grace upon grace upon grace, even in the tough moments that feel too hard for this mama.
I can choose my attitude.
I can choose joy.
I can set a different tone.